Am I addicted to stress?

You’re feeling overwhelmed and at capacity, yet the feeling never seems to end. You’re having trouble remembering a time when you didn’t feel stressed. At this point, you could say stress is a defining personality trait. At first you thought that you weren’t stressed because you were able to accomplish everything in your day and being busy wasn’t a bad thing. Stress feels like an adrenaline hit to your brain that gives you a boost of energy, confidence, and excitement.

Stress isn’t all bad and it’s not something you need to be afraid of, but what if you are actually trapped in a cycle of stress that starts to become an addiction? You continue to crave busyness, even though you’re starting to experience the downside of chronic stress. You are always on the go. You wake up in the morning dreading the day ahead and you’re not sure if you’ll be able to make it through the day because it is so packed with tasks, meetings, calls etc. By the end of the week you feel like you’re numb. You tell yourself you’re going to cut back on tasks and responsibilities, but as soon as things start to slow down you find yourself creeping back into your habits of filling the space with more tasks, worries, or work. 

You realize you’ve been feeling like you are driving through an endless list of expectations and your downtime is spent replaying past events or thinking about what’s coming next. Do you even remember how to relax or tell your brain to calm down? When was the last time you cried or allowed yourself to feel anything other than the rush of adrenaline? Maybe your body is trying to tell you to slow down but you haven’t been listening. Or perhaps the cycle of stress you’re caught in has dulled your ability to tune into what your body needs. You have aches and pains that the doctors are not sure how to diagnose, skin issues, high blood pressure, sleep issues, headaches, frequent illness or injury. It’s entirely possible all of these physical signs are your body’s way of communicating with you that you need to slow down and are potentially stuck in a chronic stress addictive cycle. 

These words are not to scare you or blame you for not making changes sooner. If you feel like you might be trapped in a chronic stress cycle, know that you are not alone and you are not to blame. Stress is not all bad and it is useful to help you get things done, conquer challenges, and build self-esteem. It’s not your fault that you are caught in this cycle. There may be demands in your life that need attention that you have to take on to keep yourself and your family safe. Or maybe you grew up in a family that was always on the go so you are not sure of a different way to be. You might be feeling pressure from work or trying to live up to the expectations of others in your life.

If your body is telling you something that you’ve been ignoring or you feel like you’re stuck in a busy schedule that is no longer working for you, it’s time to make some changes. Your mind and body will thank you. This doesn’t mean you need to avoid stress entirely, but with practice you can learn to pause and tune into your body before jumping into the next item on your to-do list. There is a way to lighten your schedule and pull back. It is not easy to make these changes, especially if your mind and body has been stuck in this cycle for a long time. Talking to a therapist can help you break this cycle so you don’t have to do it alone.